Book Review: The Stepsister Scheme

(I might end up doing a lot of these, so here’s a warm up and a great place to start.)

If you’re anything like me, (what are the chances of that, really?) than you weren’t satisfied when they told you at the end of a fairy tale ‘and they all lived happily ever after.’

No fucking way. There’s no way a family like Cinderella’s would be satisfied with her running off to the castle to be a princess. What about Sleeping Beauty’s family, now a hundred years out of date with the rest of the world? You’re telling me a child as pretty as Snow White goes out into the woods unmolested by seven guys who live all alone? No fricken way.

That said, I’ve always puzzled over what happened after the tale ended. In case you missed it in my blogs before, Jim C. Hines was nice enough to write the book for me so I didn’t have to bother.

How I Found the Book: Like most of the rest of the world, I read Whatever. When he mentioned The Stepsister Scheme, I immediately followed links around until I found Mr. Hines livejournal. Much to my delight, he was a thoughtful friendly dude with a down to earth approach to his career and his writing. The book was due out the next day, and I thought ‘well hell, even if it’s bad, at least I bought a book and supported a nice guy.’

Well shit, not only was it not bad, it was good. No, it was great! I picked it up in a Borders on the release day and started reading it while waiting for the bus to go home. I read it on the bus. I read it on the walk from the bus stop to my house. In fact, I barely put it down in the week it took me to finish it. (I read slow. This was a speed record for me.) I even read it aloud to the toddler and she got mad at me whenever I would stop.

The Good: I love Fairy Tale Princesses. I’m not going to lie to you. I love them in Disney, sure, but I love them in Grimm’s and even earlier tales. I love the blending of good feminine qualities and cleverness. I love that even when they are out witted, out matched or out gunned, a good fairy tale princess will endure thanks to her timeless grace. Grace, more as a state than a religious idea, really sings to me. I get the feeling that Hines feels similarly through his portrayal of Danielle Whitehall, the main character and his Cinderella. In short, her ‘happily ever after’ soon isn’t when a wicked scheme robs her of her new husband and possibly her life. It is, ultimately her gentle nature, her grace, and the love and faith in her friendships that really get her through.

Sounds like a stupid chick flick, I know.

It really isn’t. The action is nearly nonstop, thanks in no small part to Talia, Danielle’s companion and Hines’ answer to Sleeping Beauty. She a magically gifted dancer, and has over the years translated that dance into wicked deadly martial arts. Hines’ descriptions of Talia’s movements in combat are first rate, I could easily picture each movement.

The Bad: If you’re squeamish, or expect “Bella Sera, The Book” you aren’t ready for this book. Hines’ pulls no punches when discussing the more disgusting sides of archaic culture. Riverside towns smell as bad as fish awful, and Hines’ does fantastic job of communicating that to the reader. At times, it feels like Terry Gilliam’s Jabberwocky meets a Disney movie. (Which, it’s worth mentioning, I love, but I could see where some readers might get put off. Sissies.)

Who Will Like This Book: Anyone who loves kind hearted, deeply romantic heroines who love with a passion and won’t hesitate to break their hands on a guys face to make a point will love this book. Oh, and did I mention Hines is a gamer? Yeah, I thought you’d like that.

Who Won’t Like This Book: Haters. Men who’ve never gotten laid or are otherwise not comfortable around women. People with absolutely no feminine side. Possibly my husband.

(For the record, I’m sure that- like my husband- there are rational, good, decent people who wouldn’t like this book, but that isn’t as funny, is it?)

Next Up: Brian Keene, either The Rising, his first novel, or Castaways, depending on which I finish first. (What is leisure fiction, anyway?)